ystd night lying on bed i was wondering will u ever think abt us no matter where u are.... if u din even care in the first place, why bother.. 不知道你现在在哪里. 我不想知道，只是觉得既然你当初做了这样的选择，难道就不用负起一点点责任吗？
眼睛干干的 有想哭的心情
太多的情绪 没适当的表情 最想说的话我该从何说起
如果没有你 没有过去 我不会有伤心
但是我一直都不觉得现在这样有什么不好。至少对我而言我觉得很幸福，可是每当我想起你做过的一切，愤怒和辛酸就一涌而来，不是为了我............. 是为了她。
one chance after another, yet everytime u disappoint her. she did everything for us, and u did everything to destroy her. she's gonna be fine bcoz she gt US, u gt nothing but regrets to live ur life with.. fuck. 爱情让人变得真傻.
it's been long since i lie on my bed with my eyes wide open staring at the ceiling. thoughts flow through my mind juz like the tears did. for me, i think tt lying is the ugliest side of human beings. be it lying to others or lying to urself. whats the pt of lying to get wat u want when eventually u throw everything away.. it all started coz u lied to urself tt lying will get u thru all these. the scary part abt lies is tt it's an optional thing tt ppl do. it's in the dark and u nv know when u will be on the receiving end of it all. lying to urself is still the winner of all. u dun even have the courage to face up to reality and u think tt by deceiving urself u can deceive the world too? seriously naive.
today is one of the days i wanna be alone....
Monday, March 22, 2010
woah it's gonna be almost 2 mnths since i last blogged!! wat is happening to time man.. but i like it this way! means i'll be back faster! 3 wks already..
anw wanted to blog abt so many things but our house internet connection really sucks!!!!! testing my patience ever since we got back.. it's getting horrible. i cant stay connected to internet for more than 1hr? 2 hrs at most.. let alone vpn (the server i go thru to access fb and blogger). i even missed the man u match ystd! angry..... today is one of the rare rare days when i can have stable internet connection. keeping my fingers crossed until i type finish this post.
now i cant rem wat i wanted to blog abt le. juz a brief summary ba..
19th march 10
played bball for the first time in china!! brought my camera along but forgot to use it. how lame. shall tk photos next time.. bball is so popular in china and yet the usage of courts requires us to pay! how ridiculous.. thou it's nt expensive (5rmb for 1hr), still... they are discouraging ppl from exercising.. we shall source for free courts ard our area.. anw five of us went and we played for 3hrs! wanted to play for 1hr only den we were too engrossed until we loss track of time so exceeded into the 2nd hr.. den guess wat, we exceeded into the 3rd hr again.. lol. but it was fun! it was really a "first time" experience for me... first time playing in the cold. first time playing bball in pants. first time wearing jacket to play. first time not sweating profusely. first time paying to play. first time seeing only 1 girl playing besides us. first time 打队 with china ppl in china. first time playing with cold fingers.. woah it was nice! oh and we learnt a new term tt the china ppl use----"我的" means it's their fault.. so everytime they nv pass or shoot properly den they will say 我的.. got us confused at first.. we thought we fouled or sthing den the ball is theirs.. lol! looking forward to more bball sessions!
13th march 10
wanted to go and visit 毛主席纪念堂, but we din know tt it was under maintanence until we got there. so in the end we went to walk ard 大栅欄 instead. it's an old street nearby with alot of shops catering to tourists. being the non-typical tourists, we din go into alot of shops but we chanced upon this old cinema.. it is the first cinema tt existed in china! we got pretty excited and decided to watch a movie there. so we watched 苏乞儿 coz we tot a 武侠片 will be the most suitable for this old-aged cinema. we expected it to be v cui but it turned out to be a really huge theater! this is the first time i watched a movie with only 7 ppl in the theater including us! and it's oso the first time i took a photo in a movie theater! the screen was v v big but the visuals were abit below standard. still worth the money i wld say.. after tt we went 中山公园. nthing much but might as well since we gt nthing to do and it's in the area. den we went sizzler for dinner! shiok.. slack and ate alot.. thou we din get to see what we wanted to see in the first place, it still turned out to be an eventful and enjoyable day!
7th march 10
skiing trip!! at first i was still contemplating whether to go since i already skii before in korea. i was glad tt i decided to go bcoz it turned out to be so different! so we got up real early and started making our way to the skiing place which is somewhere at the outskirts of beijing. reached there at abt 9 plus (cant rem le)? den it was the horrible queues and alot of ppl! bcoz it's the last few days tt the skiing place is opened (since the weather is getting warmer), there is a 90% discount on the entrance fee! saved abt 100rmb per person! by the time we got our equipments and our coaches, it was already abt 11 plus. wasted so much time. long story short, we learnt how to skii down a slope and break. haha.. coz the coach was only with us for 2hrs.. i wanted to learn how to turn by applying ur bodyweight but he din teach tt. we wanna go back for more next yr!!
hmmm pretty long post huh.. nt really a summary. lol. i cant wait for may-june to come! alot of exciting trips coming up. we are planning to go inner mongolia and an amusement park near our place! yeah...
till the next time my internet is good then...